The basics: Cognitive
Restructuring is learn to see things including problems and obstacles in a
different way and having more information to deal with problems or needs. It
starts with the cognitive years of development which is from 3-8 years of
age. We all learn from those that influences us and our great sphere of
influence for most of us are either parents or the television. This is not
about blame, but getting another perspective. Our parents did the best they
knew how and gave us the information and beliefs that were available to them
at the time we were at that age.
Beliefs, are a
powerful force in our lives, good or bad beliefs, control our lives in what
we do, who we are with, who we marry or admire and what we focus on in life.
Some beliefs are good and some not so good and our hearts control, which
beliefs we accept or reject.
They all gave us information
one what they believed to be true, regardless whether it was true or not.
Beliefs are powerful elements in our lives and beliefs control how we see
things. A simple example is a glass that is either half empty or half full.
Depending on how you were raised you will see the glass one way or the
other. Beliefs can kill if they are not good
beliefs. Some
beliefs are good and either keep us from getting hurt and even out of
trouble and some beliefs get us into trouble, not just with legal
authorities, but in our relationships and or children and how we work in our
lives and how we view money or our income and how to get more money.
For
example some say, "I don't need a million dollars." Well the truth is if
your thirty and make only $33,000 per year and you work till your 60 you
will have made over a million dollars and what people are finding out to
have a secure financial future takes more than making $33,000 a year. So why
do we train for jobs or careers that only pay that much when actually we
need to be making two or three times that amount? Answer is simple, yet
complicated. It's beliefs. That is why we all do what we are doing, because
we believe it to be correct and either we are willing to look at something
other than our beliefs and learn something new or we will just continue in
the beliefs that we have.
A logical
question at this point: If you know you are working to make a million
dollars so you can live and pay your bills and you have a choice of spending
30 years doing it or only 1 or two years, which would you choose?
Beliefs are a prison. They
control everything we do in life and what we do in life and what we will not
do. Some with their beliefs get religious and think they are quoting
scripture when they say "money is the root of all evil," when in actuality
what it says is the "the love of money is the root of all evil," which is
something totally different.
Beliefs are like a
merry-go-round. An endless game we play with ourselves. Beliefs are not
reality, it is a belief. Reality is something you or anyone has experienced,
but many think that it is beliefs including religious beliefs that will see
them through. Time to find the truth. Either we want the truth about life
and how to make it through life or we play the game and worse if its a game
to ourselves then its also a game with our families, intentional or not,
which is one reason that the divorce rate is as high as it is.
Beliefs control our lives and
income, because our beliefs control what we learn and
or we see or hear or do and how
we speak!
Who needs it? People do what they do,
because that is what they know to do!
Cognitive
Restructuring is the key that unlocks the door allowing us to separate good
beliefs, from beliefs that may be holding us back.
To be free in life one needs
to know what they are doing and why they are doing it, so they can make
adjustments in life. If we are not free then we are slaves. If we are being
controlled by our beliefs then we are not free and can be controlled by
others and if not free we can not be equal and as a result can not fully
respect ourselves or others. Beliefs control who we marry or vote for and
who we work for and spend most of our lives. The picture gets worse, because
we can be living our whole lives with the illusion that we are free when
really we are not.
Beliefs can affect
individuals, families, towns, regions and even countries. One such
example of beliefs that got way out of hand was in September. On September
11, 2001, the heart of New York City was devastated after terrorists crashed
two planes into the World Trade Center. The twin towers, a prominent symbol
of American financial might, were the first buildings to collapse. Four
hijacked passenger jets have crashed in the US, destroying the World Trade
Center in New York and damaging the Pentagon in Washington. Thousands of
people were killed. The beliefs of the terrorists and the beliefs of the US
in response to the terrorist action has changed the course of history.
These
changes have affected almost everyone globally. On that particular day many
beliefs that affect us all where exposed. The terrorists had the belief that
what the US cared about was finances and in getting rid of the the towers it
would effect or interrupt trade at the very least. Then in response the US
somehow decided that the terrorists where hiding in Iraq, which sent the US
into a war that seems to have spread. It seems that the belief of the US is
that if terrorists live in any particular country, if it suites the US, then
it is alright to invade that country, because of the war on terrorism.
There are also religious
beliefs of not only the terrorists, but also the other side. One question is
whether God is about freedom, equality and respect for others or the other
side
is control and manipulation. Beliefs project one or the other and of course
each is always right, which is why perhaps there are so many religions? The
point is beliefs, good or bad beliefs affect us all. Beliefs are based on
how we perceive or see things in life. Those perceptions may or may not be
accurate. One example of a really bad perception on the US's part was that
Iraq had weapons of mass destruction that was pointed not only at the US,
but other countries as well.
A smaller example of beliefs,
perhaps more on a local level, is deciding who that is in need gets helped
and who does not. In addition, we have beliefs about how to deal with drugs
or crime. Then criminals have beliefs also. Either way cognitive
restructuring is needed badly to expose the beliefs and alter the beliefs so
there is a possibility of a future on earth not only for ourselves, but our
children as well, because after we are gone, our children are stuck with
what we have created out of our beliefs and perceptions, all of which are
learned in the cognitive years of development.
Why someone might want change;
On a personal level our
beliefs control which school we may go to or who we marry or what career we
may choose or even how we see debt or how we see money and the exchange of
money.
One definition for insanity, "is
to continue to do the same things over and over again,
and expect different results."
We do what we do in life, because
"we do not perceive there to be
any other option, to do something
differently."
Part of the problem is us in
allowing some of the wrong people into office to make decisions for us.
These policies affect our lives and certainly how problems or obstacles are
dealt with even on a local level. This all affects our taxes, which seem to
go up, regardless if things get better or not. When allowing this to happen
we give up our personal freedoms. We do this because perhaps we are too busy
or perhaps we believe we cannot do any better or are able to make any
effectual changes.
These beliefs allow others to
run our lives for us while calling it independence. So who need cognitive
restructuring? We all do. We all need to be able to clearly see not only
what has happened and why, but be able to see better solutions and then work
together to bring a resolve to those obstacles and problems. Can two or more
walk together in life, unless they agree? No, its not possible.
It
starts with the belief of either changing the top and as a result everything
changes below or it starts with change on the bottom which changes
everything above. An example of this simply is if those on the bottom feel
its up to those we let be on public office then things will never change,
because that is how it has always been. To change the top we need to change
the bottom and our expectations of what we expect in life. Currently the
expectation is that those we put in office or allow in office because we
don't do anything about it, is that it is up to them to fix things, when in
actuality it is a statement that says we are powerless to bring change and
that makes us a victim and also means that we are not equal as government or
business is in control of our lives.
This all affects the way we
look at life, government, crime, money or income, debt and debt resolution,
personal relationships, how we raise or children and perhaps even how we go
to church with the current expectations we have. This effects not only or
minds or souls, but also how we view medicine, doctors or the health
industry.
The question is how do we
turn things around and is it important enough to us to turn things around?
That is a belief in itself, but one thing is for sure if we do nothing and
expect things to get better, that is part of the problem.
Each
of us has an opportunity to do something different if we choose to do so.
Each of us are on a path in life that will either make things easier for us
and our children or make it more difficult. It should be obvious that things
cannot continue much longer without some greatly needed changes, but those
changes need to start within us and each of us choosing to go on a better
path in life. Change however, can only come if each person desires change.
It is all about learning a new way to view things in life and that is up to
each of us.
We at the TKOH foundation,
have put together a program that can change the way you see things. This can
and will change how you do things and it starts with putting control back in
your hands, not ours, the governments or even the place you may work at. The
TKOH Cognitive Restructuring Program is about learning how to get your
personal freedoms back and once your freedom is back, then we can be equal.
Related:
Mapping Your
Future
Starting a School, Practice or Counseling Center & How they are
Related
How to Start a Ministry or Practice
Starting & Funding a Ministry or Practice
Making a Plan
Contact Us
The greater the distance between those that have and
those that do not have, the less peace there is or can be!
One solution of course is to take from the rich and
give to the poor!
The other solution is to help those in need bring
their quality of life up and that is what all of TKOH works to accomplish.
